MAKE A DIFFERENCE – MAKE A STAND
November 2019
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Rape Is Rape

 

“He was next to me and I have no idea because I was so out cold,” she says. “This person, who I’m supposed to trust, would drug me and make me be so out cold that I couldn’t respond if something was wrong with my children.”

 

She was reviewing files on his hard drive and made a shocking discovery: four videos he filmed raping her while she lay unconscious. In one video, the camera zooms in on her face and lying next to her in the bed is her young son.

 

Womens’ rights groups campaigned state-by-state for lawmakers to change their laws, and by 1993, marital rape was technically illegal in all 50 states. But, there’s these little loopholes and sub-statutes that hide deep in the books that pop out every once and awhile.

 

We need to stand up together against all forms of rape, whether it be marital rape or date rape, rape is rape and should not be accepted.

 

At Men Against Rape we stand up against these injustices of life and attempt to rectify these actions of abuse.

 

Stand up with us and make a difference.

 

 

 

It’s hard to know what to do, how to feel, or what your options are after a sexual assault. Please know that you’re not alone.

 

Here are three tips about what to do if you or anyone you know has been raped:

  1. Find a safe environment, away from the attacker. Ask a trusted friend to stay with you.
  2. Remember that what happened was NOT your fault.
  3. Ask the hospital to conduct a rape kit exam to preserve forensic evidence.

 

You may not have safety had control over the situation but you have control over what you can do thereafter.

 

Your rape does not define you.

 

You are a beautiful individual and being a victim of rape does not make you any less beautiful.

 

Do not question your life choices, you were and are not at fault. Being a rape victim was not because of the clothes you were wearing, it was not because of the underwear you were wearing that made your confidence level rise. It was not because you decided to go out and have a good eveing.

 

Rape is an act that should not be tolerated.

 

At Men Against Rape we stand up against sexual assaults, we are against these individuals being a part of society and are determined to lower the rape statistics on South Africa and the world alike.

 

 

I am not a victim, I am a victor.

 

 

 

 

The end of a busy work day was the start of an unforgettable night.

 

My colleagues and I were picked up by an unknown car carrying 3 men that gave off a strange atmosphere.

 

The driver took us off road. I started panicking and asked him where he was taking us, but instead of answering me the guy seated at the back with us took out a gun and pointed it straight at my head. He told us to shut up and behave or he’d blow us up. We were all so frightened.

 

We were taken to a nearby veld where the three men, all armed now, started assaulting us. They took our phones and all our belongings. One of them started to strip my uniform and forced me onto the ground.

 

He raped me right there with my colleagues helplessly watching.

 

One of the other guys, carrying what looked like a kitchen knife, came up to me and also tried to force himself on me – when I tried to resist he stabbed me in my thigh and forced my legs apart.

 

My friends watched in horror as all this was happening to me, but where still helpless.

 

The next thing I knew I was thrown back into the car. They drove off with me leaving my friends behind.

 

As the car sped off two of the guys continued assaulting me, beating me and calling me names. I prayed to God to take my life as I couldn’t take the pain anymore. It was then that the thugs threw me out of moving car on to the middle of the road.

 

As I lay there covered in my own blood all I could think was that this was the end to me. I couldn’t feel pain anymore – my whole body was numb. As I lay there I couldn’t wait for a car to hit me and finish me off.

 

But God had other plans for me.

 

I must have passed out because the next thing I knew I woke up in the hospital with friends and family by my bedside. To this day, four years later, no arrests have been made but I believe God will bring me justice one day.

 

I’m still trying to cope with what happened to me and I refuse to be called a victim of rape.  I am a victor. I survived the worst experience any woman can and I am still alive to tell my story.

 

Women are not the victims of rape; they are the victors of a brutal life experience.

 

 

You can survive rape. I have. Just.

 

 

 

I was raped at knifepoint and held hostage by a man who I served in a restaurant when I was a teenage girl, many years ago.

 

He aggressively warned me that if I made a noise or tried to struggle he would ‘slice me up like a kipper’.

 

He told me to sit on the floor below his feet…

 

I’m not going to explain what happened next but whatever you can imagine, just times it by 10 on the horrific scale, and you’ll still not quite be there. The memories of what happened live in a dark part of my mind where they belong, never to see the light of day again if I can help it.

 

To this day I have never set foot in my home town again. I found myself a job in a hotel where I could live in and made a new life for myself. Some years later I married and had my own children but I never told a soul about what happened to me.

 

Read the full story: https://leics.police.uk/maggies_story

I have always been determined that what happened was never going to destroy the rest of my life as well.

 

I work with victims now, mostly young people but sometimes victims of domestic violence and sex crimes. I know I have that empathy with them and their situations because of what happened to me all those years ago. We have so much training now and I’ve seen how radically differently victims are treated.

 

No one can change what happened but they can change the way you deal with it and help you to get the justice and support you deserve so you can move on with your life.

 

Please feel free to share your stories with us and give us the opportunity to help you find closure.

 

We are here to help you get back up and live the life you deserve.